Expect the Unexpected

Posted On December 30, 2020

And Embrace It!

We learned from 2020 to Expect the Unexpected and were forced to embrace it. But, we didn’t like it and now are looking forward to having nothing unexpected happen in 2021. But in looking back, I realize that each year is full of the Unexpected. How we embrace it, defines our happiness. With that idea in mind, you might enjoy the following message I shared in a breakout session at a 2019 women’s conference at my church. I was asked to speak on “Retired, but Refired!” I’ve added a few updated comments for this blog post.

Before Retirement

I retired in 2013. I had been a secretary for ten years followed by stints as a bank teller and a receptionist in a doctor’s office before I went back to college for three years and got my teaching degree at the age of 33. I spent the next 23 years working for the local school district–one year as a teacher’s aide at the Missouri Girl’s Town campus school, three years as the high school principal’s secretary and 19 years as a high school business, leadership and yearbook teacher and sponsor of about everything there is to sponsor!

In addition to spending countless hours on my job, I tried my best to be a good wife to a farmer, a good mother to two daughters and a son, a good daughter to elderly parents and a good member of my church and community.

I have to admit that everyone received far less of my time than the staff and students I worked with. I absolutely loved working with high school students and was extremely involved with the extracurricular activities.

I expected have difficulty retiring. Unexpectedly, though, the minute I found that I was eligible to get full retirement pay at the end of the year that I was currently teaching, I could hardly think of anything else! God quickly helped me realize that a younger, more tech-savvy teacher would be better for the students and that I was physically and mentally ready for a break.

My Retirement – My Expectations

So, for the last year I taught, I spent lots of time visualizing what retirement would look like. First, and foremost, I was going to stay up late, sleep late and take lots of naps. Next, I was going to spend lots of time reading, my favorite hobby.

I was ready to spend time helping and visiting the older people I loved. I planned to spend time visiting with my mother in the nursing home. I wanted to visit with my elderly cousins, Verna and Jalie, while helping them with household chores and taking them on errands.

I was going to get in better shape physically by walking every single day.

Although I dearly loved my grandchildren, I had always made it clear that I never wanted to be a full-time babysitter to them as I had already raised children and was going to be very busy in my retirement.

Retirement has not been what I expected–probably because I did not discuss my plans with my husband and, to be honest, didn’t ask for God’s guidance! It has been full of unexpected events and situations. But, because I choose to embrace the unexpected, retirement has been so much better than what I expected!

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Time Spent with my Mother

When I retired, I quickly was able to accomplish two of my goals. I stayed up late, slept late and took lots of naps. And, second, I read lots of books, often three or more a week.

The first full year of retirement was pretty much as I expected, but I never expected what the rest has been like.

By the time I retired, my mother suffered so much from dementia that she rarely knew who I was and didn’t converse with anyone at all. I was challenged on how to spend time with her. She ended up having beautiful nails. I would clean, trim, file and paint them. It turned out to be a great way for us to have physical contact. She’d get mad, saying I was hurting her, but could always be soothed when we would share a Pepsi together as she admired her nails. Sometimes I’d just rest on her bed and every time I’d look over at her in her chair, she’d give me a contented smile. I now find that I miss those days, even though we didn’t talk.

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Visiting Other Loved Ones

Verna and Jalie were my mom’s first cousins (Jalie by marriage) and I had spent lots of time with them as a child. I looked forward to spending time with them again while showing my appreciation of them by helping with household chores and taking them on errands.

I was able to take Verna on a couple of errands and visited a few times with Jalie, but soon one moved to a retirement center and the other to a nursing home with her husband. Visiting them there was not what I wanted to do, but I quickly realized then was when they really needed visitors the most. I visited Jalie more often as she was located nearer. I visited Verna and met her new friends. Sadly, Jalie has passed away and Verna’s home is on a pandemic lockdown.

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Exercise

I started walking my first day of retirement and by the third day, my knee hurt so bad, I had to take a week-long break. Then I walked a few more days and the knee pain returned.

I went to an orthapaedic doctor. He said he could find nothing wrong other than tight hamstrings. He advised that I quit walking and take up swimming. Swimming is not a convenient year-round activity, so, I’ve started weekly gentle yoga sessions! Not in my wildest expectations did I ever see myself doing yoga! It involves much needed stretches led by a fun teacher (and new friend) with other good friends thereby overshadowing the fact that I’m exercising.

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Grandchildren – Babysitting and Trips

In 2015, my daughter had a daughter, Laney, and three weeks later, my son had a son, Bennett. Bennett couldn’t swallow. He spent three months on a feeding tube in the NICU and two more years at home with a feeding tube.

It ended up that I was the only person available, who my son and daughter-in-law felt comfortable with to care for Bennett when they returned to work. I kept him for about nine months. Since I was keeping him, it was also less trouble to keep the other younger grandchildren from time to time. I loved every minute snuggling with those kids. Praise God, Bennett has no trouble swallowing now.

After that stint of babysitting, I felt I owed some time to my older grandkids, so I took the two oldest on a ten-day car trip to Virginia and Washington, DC. I would have never expected to enjoy that trip with them as much as I did.

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Move and Become Snowbirds

What I least expected was what my husband wanted to do in retirement. He wanted to go to the South for the winter months and stay in our camper. Until retirement, he had never once mentioned such an idea. I was dumbfounded!

I never thought we would move from the home we built and lived in for forty years, but all I had to do was point out a house for sale, and he said, “Make an offer.”

So, we have spent winters in Florida for six years and moved to a different home four years ago. I love both.

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Allow God to Refire You

My message to you was supposed to be “Retired, but Refired.” I wasn’t really sure what Refired meant, so I looked it up. It’s “a state, process, or instance of combustion in which fuel or other material is ignited and combined with oxygen, giving off light, heat and flame.” Pottery is often refired when the potter is not satisfied with his work.

Isaiah 64:8 says “Yet, O Lord, you are our Father. We are the clay, you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand.”

I want to give off His light and represent the flame of the Holy Spirit.

When I was reading about refiring pottery, I came across this quote, “I have heard of people firing the same piece up to 10 different times. Sometimes they just aren’t happy with a piece, so they add more and refire. Other times it is a deliberate plan.”

I believe, without a doubt, that God has repeatedly refired me and He always has a deliberate plan for my life. His plans for me are usually unexpected. Praise God, I’ve learned to embrace them because they are always better plans than mine..

Romans 9:20 says, ” But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? ‘Shall what is formed say to him who formed it, ‘Why did you make me like this? Does not the potter have the right to make out of the same lump of clay some pottery for noble purposes and some for common use?”

Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

Start a New Ministry

I am a common person that God has decided to use in a different way than he has in the past and definitely in a way I did not expect. I am now totally on fire as a leader of a new minstry my church launched on November 3, 2019, called Celebrate Recovery. I have never been as excited about anything my church has ever done than I am about this ministry.

It is the church emulating Christ when he said in Mark 2:17, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners,” and again in Luke 5:31 “Jesus answered them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.”

Celebrate Recovery is a biblical and balanced program to help people overcome their HURTS, HANG-UPS and HABITS. It’s where broken people are transformed by the power of Christ.

http://Pleasant Grove Celebrate Recovery

http://Celebrate Recovery

2021 – Expect the Unexpected And Embrace It!

As you prepare for 2021, Expect the Unexpected and Embrace It! God can use any unexpected situation to further his Kingdom through you if you will let him Refire you! How you Embrace Unexpected situations will define your happiness for this coming year.